Quotes on Computers

"Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning."

"If the automobile had followed the same development cycle as the computer, a Rolls-Royce would today cost $100, get a million miles per gallon, and explode once a year, killing everyone inside."

"The computer is a moron."

"In all large corporations, there is a pervasive fear that someone, somewhere is having fun with a computer on company time. Networks help alleviate that fear."

"Computers will never take the place of books. You can't stand on a floppy disk to reach a high shelf."

"Computers are fantastic. In an instant, one of them can make a mistake so awesome it would take human beings many weeks to equal it."

"Computers are like bikinis - they save people a lot of guesswork."

"640K ought to be enough for anybody."

"He who steals Microsoft software steals trash."

"Computers can figure out all kinds of problems, except the things in the world that just don't add up."

"A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing."

"Computers are useless. They can only give you answers."

"Where a calculator on the ENIAC is equipped with 18,000 vaccuum tubes and weighs 30 tons, computers in the future may have only 1,000 vaccuum tubes and perhaps weigh 1 1/2 tons."

"Imagine if every Thursday your shoes exploded if you tied them the usual way. This happens to us all the time with computers, and nobody thinks of complaining."

"Computers make it easier to do a lot of things, but most of the things they make it easier to do don't need to be done."

"In a few minutes a computer can make a mistake so great that it would have taken many men many months to equal it."